reflect

Ryan:
As we near the release of the storybook inspired and near psychic induced album we mustered up, I find myself reflecting even more. Never have I changed as much as I have in the past 4 months. The death of someone I felt closer to than most of those throughout my days really spun everything all around. I have felt lost in many ways. It's been extremely difficult to let go of it, and the art is even getting clouded lately. It truly feels like it happened at the most peculiar time. A time that made far too much sense, and I'm having a hard time of dropping that. When you share just about everything you have and feel with someone it's hard to just let it go. Luckily we have such amazing fans who care, and people to support through it all. I've been different, and it's moving slow, but the music keeps the inspiration going. I am excited for you to all hear what I'm talking about here and in previous posts. It's been a long and difficult journey, but I feel it was worth it. I hope you do too. February 10th we'll find out what you think. . .

Michelle Brim

Ryan:
More of a personal thing, but I figured I'd blog it since I have to get this out in all ways. I stated the morning with news darker than any monday has ever been for me. The word came in of the death of my dear friend Michelle Brim. It's only a week after the anniversary of my other friend, Scot Gordon who took his life in 2003, which alone almost drained me completely. Now I feel empty. I've lost all emotions. I'm in the so called "shock" mode, and the flashbacks are brighter than ever. Life is so sad really. To see those you love disappear completely has such a huge effect, and can never be explained till it happens. I'm dead inside right now, but full of hope that maybe now she is finally in a happy place, smiling forever, and letting a true love surround her. I love ya Michelle, and I'll always remember you. You changed me forever with all you did. You are truly my little DM.